i am totally pmsing. i can feel it in all ways possible.

i have come to a conclusion that i can never ever ever study at home. i study more in hall than at home. sheesh!

a thought came to my mind today during worship in church.

i am not the best- (the humility i need)
but; i am one of the best (the confidence i need)

---------
all the best mentos! jiayou!! =)

rarh.

i'm sorry.

its either i'm pms-ing or i am just simply not the girl u once knew anymore.

short term or long term? u just have to wait and see. because i have no idea too.

so dun tell me about u know what because i really cannot be bothered.

good luck with whatever you are doing.

bye bye.

sian

i am feeling ultra sian now. i think i know why i feel sian. but i can't help it.

--------------

all of sudden, i feel spiritually dry. i think it is a sudden realisation. like mentos' irritating hp alarm "ohiyOOOOoooooooooooooooooOOOOoo..'..

it woke me up.

as i listen to the songs played on my media player, i wondered how foolish i've been these few months. why have i chosen things that are not impt? why have i forsaken Him?

and so, i repent. i do it just like how Paul did it. and i thank Him for listening.

partly because of how i led the kids to worship this afternoon, and just to hear the children sing, touched my heart. if it touches my heart, what more does it do to my Father's heart above? i'm so certain He was smiling at us, telling us the same thing.. He said "I Love You too."


and i hope the children felt it too (altho they were super rowdy yday- i was so close to minusing all their points. RARH)

-----------

i wouldn't say i'm stress. i just feel so sian of almost everything now.

a CERTAIN someone said my blog is so emo, and i told him "well, its MY blog", and perhaps i was a tinge disappointed that he still didn't really know me.

so tmr is a new day, a new start.

Dear God, let it be a refreshing one.

mother + day + maid in manhatten

hmm.. i got tired of studying bonds. actually, i didn't really think i focused on studying it anyways. =( altho i've been at it since 9.. and now is like.. 2.. haha..

mummy's lying on my bed. before she closed her eyes, she said " i miss my air con." hahahaa.. and she's so tired, she didn't even fliched when corn was in my room 5 min ago and we were making quite a lot of noise. so much for meteor garden, haha..

hmm from the looks of it, i think i'll pull the mattress in later.

jo bo also sleeping, didn't even brush her teeth. that woman canot make it.

-----

hmm.. friday just came and went. i spent the whole day sleeping and trying to do sth productive which also meant, i didn't really do much today. only remembered snoozing my alarm clock numerous times, ate breakfast, watch a little news on a certain Dr Unis who was awarded the seoul nobel prize for micro credit ( of which i think is an EXCELLENt idea), stared at mess for a few min, read my script, did a lil on finance, slept, drank my white ipoh coffee. ate dinner, watched tv, and more tv. hahaha..

if only everyday was like this.. i think i'ld just be bored to death. (but i'm not saying anything abt the sleeping part)

hmm.. over the past 3 days, i've been thinking abt the dresses. haha.. so pathetic. gawd. haix. *prays*

---------------
maid in manhattan: social classes, skin colour, politics and media, and of course, the hotel industry. =)

another avenue to be looked into. =)

-----------

ok.. i think i shall go pull in the mattress..

have i ever told you that my mother is a superwoman? phwoar. she's happening.

vivocity and thoughts alike

a kiss speaks volumes.

it speaks of love, passion, desire and reassurance.

Also, it speaks of appreciation, apology, regret.

it just depends on the situation you are in, and how you feel about it.

Most importantly, it comes from the heart.

-----------------------

studied with angeline at the lib today. we sneaked in a can of coffee into the lib. but we soon realised that everybody sneaked drinks in to, so it was prob legal to do that. hmm.

we decided to go vivocity for the heck of it. and so, angeline, being my tour guide brought me ard the places that she has allready explored. hahah..

we both agreed in wonder and amazement how high the ceiling was. haha. it was quite funny.. but nvm.

anyways, the both of us found this really happening shop. the dresses were less than $40!! laureen went crazy- and i tried 3 dresses in a row. there was this particular purple dress that i was so in love with, i have decided to psycho corn to get it for me.

aneline's been fun! i found a new good fren. =)

-------------

hey dude, i hope we got it right. and i hope you are feeling much better. =) gimme a msg when u're feeling better okay?

and lets play mindsweeper flags!!! =)

do i freaking look like a piece of commodity to you to pass around?

urgh.

then again, i think i may have done the same. i dunno lah. sigh.

dear you,

i wrote one whole paragraph, just about to post it up, when i decided to delete the whole post. i dun think i should be writing abt how i feel now, because it is not impt at the moment.

i pray ur princess comes soon too.

think i'll leave you alone for now. but i'll always be here, and you know that.

will be waiting. really.

-laur

i'm geting older.

i read it.

and i want to tell you now, that all the times we had together, i treasured it. esp the very first night at the esplanade. i knew i found a good fren then and there.

btw, it was THAT scary. and i'm THAT lousy. haha

-----------

hai.. i feel older.

i dun have any of those immature thoughts that i used to have once- in terms of my behaviour: on how i should react, on what i should do.

no longer do i want to go clubs, no longer do i crave for alcohol (i just drink it at home- with father)

i start thinking abt my future, and i dun really give a shit of what i've done.

i think of all who i've been in love with all these 20 years, and i snigger at my ownself.

how childish.

somehow, i'm glad. i'm glad i'm starting to think like how i would really want to- altho i said this ike a million times, but i'm really glad.

what i have to do now, is to increase the thickness of my skin. and simply to understand that i'm no superwoman and my philosophy of life may just have to be edited.

i feel older, but i feel better.

sincerity

it really hurts to see you hurt and that there's nothing i can do. perhaps if you were to tell me face to face, i'ld tear right in front of you. i think i feel this way because i know exactly how u feel and that feeling sucks and hence, i don't want you to feel this way; because you are impt to me.

if i could, i'ld give you a hug which i hope it can tell u how sorry i am.

that probably says something about how i feel for you?

i'm not sure..

i'm just so sorry.

ramblings

HAHAHAHAA..

geri the cherry † says:
haha so cute . shibin long hair she look very guai and decent leh !!

geri the cherry † says:
awww...

geri the cherry † says:
u dun think so mehhhhh

laur [FOBC]: i love coffee says:
u mean last time dun look guai and decent??

laur [FOBC]: i love coffee says:
with the *bomb* hairstyle

laur [FOBC]: i love coffee says:
hahaha

geri the cherry † says:
haha no la last time short hair.. more like, "sporty"

geri the cherry † says:
not sporty la. i dunno what word to use

***

hahahaah.. binny binny bin bin. we so love your *bomB* hair. hahahaha...

hmmm.. its been quite a while since i blogged. Jo has finished PSLE. *jumps ard* i feel super liberated in the midst of datelines of reports.

talk about about irony. sheesh.

the weeks been crazy. i haven't got enough sleep.

it is end of week 8 already. how fast is that. sheesh. many things to do, many hours needed- esp to sleep.

talking to geri and dinie now. i miss those days.

i miss my KC mates: jas, troy, celest and dinah.

okay. think i shall sleep. thats what i really need right now. =)

---------

God You make me smile.

Thank you.

irony

i just had my holiday.

i am just sooo tired.

do u see the irony?

sigh. you jie said i'm looking more tired everyday. i dun disagree.

hmmm. i'm relying on the wrong strength. =\

the voice in my head

i thought of what i said, then i shook my head in disbelief, laughed and there's a voice in my head that goes:

"HHAAHAHA.. nonono.. cannot cannot...!!! wth were u thinking!!!"

yea. so. ya. heh.

just a comment

sheesh. being of that mature age, u should have already come to understand why they think like that. its not because it earns big money but perhaps, it is a stable job. a job that they know you wouldn't (very much) have to worry about seasons and all.

in theory "follow your dreams", in practical "do what the world asks of you". passion comes to a nought esp when u are placed in a school of people who can excel in this area.

i have yet to decide my major. my heart says finance. but my head says no. how far can i go? in a school competing with the rest of the elites? which is more preferable: sth you have interest but no ability to score? (and since ur grades actually matter a lot, it affects your success rate in securing a good job.) OR sth which u dun have much interest in- but probably able to secure a good grade?

Life is not just a bed of roses. watch out for the thorns beneath the petals.

you just have to wake up to reality; and you have a lot to learn.

the semi annual attack of the powerful sleepy bug

i think eating makes me sleep.

stupid sleepy bug. shoo. go away.

urghh. the hols are slipping away. cannot staaaaaaaaaaand!! =(

the heart is willing; but the flesh, otherwise.

i reaaaaaaaaly want to get this assignments done and over with.

i reaaaaaaaaaaaly want to finish this stupid proj so that i can start with revising the rest of my mid terms next week.

i reaaaaaaaaaaallly want to start doing.

but the stupid problem is that inertia of starting to do work.

fai would be glad to know that i've popped many chocs in my mouth in a span of an hour to get things going. which, hasn't started.

sigh.

the heart is willing; but the flesh, otherwise.

*twirls ard, plops on the floor, stare into the sky, smile, and thank God i'm alive.

------------------

a dominatrix is not a prostitute.

a symbol of power for women.

confidence, strength, bold

arrogant, sadist, sexual

- scary.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..!!! =@

oh.. btw..

just to clear things up.. haha i'm not pissed abt the whole buaya incident. at least not anymore. hahahaha..

not that i was xiao qi, i just felt superly duperly cheated in feeling guilty abt ron.

like i said, i prob shouldn't have anyway.

but things just come naturally.

not abt character here, but about the feelings of the heart.

thoughts + buaya week

all of a sudden. i feel lost.

its not much of what happened; but rather, i think i have sth for you. to deny, i'll be bluffing myself.

u're someone i nv knew i would actually think i'll develop sth for you.

but it was just yday that you were the first person to come to my mind.

but hey, reality ain't a faiytale.

----------

i don't like you one bit. that is the end of our friendship.

-----------------
went walking ard with serm round hall just now. saw the rest of the other decorations in other blocks.

while observing, i realised that this year's buaya week taught me one thing: love is fickle and true love is hard to find.

and i think i'll give up my search.. for now.

=)

------------

buaya week!! =)



thaaaaaaaaaaaank you guowei for your efforts in making this week a memorable one.

thank you ronald for being an ass. haha.. and btw, i didn't tell you to drink my milo lor. i told you it was HOT lor thats all!!! eeeediot.

thanks winnie darling for letting me stay in ur room this past week. =D

thanks liannie for the hospitality as well.

thanks shixiu aka 'THE 1' for providing me a chair to sit in the lift.

thanks sean and ronald aka lion heart and lion ballz for the pretty railway track. thanks for the effort and the love.

thanks seniors for your love, care and understanding.

thanks bona for ur understanding and ur concern. ( thanks for helping me get an audition too!! =))

thanks eve for being there.

thanks gazarians for reminding me the joy of staying in hall.

thanks for the love, my acers. =)

thanks heng fai.. for ur love , my photo, the beautiful poem that perhaps.. is really true.

i'll get the pics up when i can, i think. =)

-----------------

oh btw, i got in sp!! yay!! hahaha

buaya week

and it has started!!

*jumps ard

haha.. oh wells. just asked myself while i was doing stuff for buayee last night,, why i was looking fwd to such events.

and i thought hard while cutting paper: i love to see everybody happy. =)

i love my astro boy!!!!! hahaha.. oh sheesh.

got to go seokie's bday dinner now..

projects and all can be left to tmr...... i think.

oh dear.

a quick one

ah. week 5. about to be over. and here we all are, staring into week 6 that lies just ahead.

i have 2 quizes- 1 each on mon and tues, 1 presentation and 1 proj to be handed in on wed.

-.-

this means i can't buaya ppl properly laaa!!! =( dammit.

haha..

oh wells.

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serene's leaving tmr.. i start worrying for her then i stopped.

if God is for her, who can be against her?

serene mama, i love you.



wait for me in Osaka! i'm saving!!!!!!!