reflection + don + sian-ness

i am so disgusted with myself.

i can actually wake up every 5 min to snooze my alarm clock for a total of 1 hour and 25 min. my goodness.


*pui. disgusted.

*pui pui pui.


-------

went out with siew wen yday to do a lil shopping and a lil filling in of certain events that happened eether recently or looong time ago.

got my new specs (*YAY) and a supper cool esprit jacket yday. =D it was like ex la. haha but i think its worth it, siewwen fell in love with it the first time she saw it in white, and i fell in love with it first time i saw it in black. its so pretty, with huge buttons and all. :)


sigh. my fav shop sale season hasn't end and the clothes are super sucky. i am so irritated. i still have yet to spend my vouchers and i have 27 days to do it. please tell me if you will be going to shop there, PLEASE tell me. i need to exchange it for cash for my crumpler. i have like 0 cash left. urgh. i wonder what happen if i went for a temp job insteadd of an internship. gosh i think i have like double of pay now man. =/


anyway, had a nice long talk with siew wen at coff bean. we sat there for like close to 3 hours just talking. we talked about everything, esp about hall. about this person and that person... haha but anyways, the person who really struck me whom we talked about was the guy who tied to kill me, aka don.

just happen to recall what we said, sw mentioned how slack all year 4s have become, and that nobody will call year 4 girs 'cute' like how the senior guys describe the younger ones, especially after open house on MOnday. haha. also, how uninvolved they have become with matters relating to hall, and they don't give a hoot and just leave all of it to the next generation.

then i think about how i heard 2 seniors, my year, claimed that it was time to "get back what they gave". haha.. =) well, i guess its subjective, and you can't blame them for saying it. I am obviously in no position to judge because my commitments are like only half of theirs. so their beliefs are understandable.

So look at don, 4 years: 3 years committed to SP, and rag, rugby, whatever else he's in and still going on. directing SP and highly likely writing a script. his dedication to rag is commendable.

haha.. o wells. God really made us differently. =)

oh yeah, don, this post is for you. =)

---------

so much to do yet so sian to do. dunno start where. suuuper sian. can we like you know, fast forward to the good parts. -.-

ok i wasn't thinking of click.

i want to watch simpsons.

rarh.

crazy week ahead.

letters time.

harry potter? been there, done that. =)

o, i forgot to add: i watched potter le. hahahah

i love adrian and xj! :) who called me even before i wanted to ask them.

although they made me feel like a failure as a girl, i still love them anyway.

it was so funny when potter was flying past the thames, with london as the backdrop and adrian said, " eh! there there! i stay there!"

haha.. i think i was the only idiot laughing so loud then.

a post from my room

my man is a darling. =)

a remy- i am so one of the firsts in the country- and a bag of m&ms of weird colours i've never seen before.

yep...ok, perhaps more than a darling. =)

-------------

great. i managed to leech off free connection. hhaha. typing in the comfort of my room. great. its been long since i last did that. =)

so much has happened since.. God knows when. ever since it started, things starts to lose its balance.

i like to believe that life is like a see saw. there is a need to maintain a balance on both sides of life. if one is neglected, the sea saw tilts, favouring the other side, vice versa. and perhaps that is what is happening to me.

perhaps i neglected her a fair bit. been selfish, if i can admit. but i just can't help but wonder if its totally my fault? sigh. then again, what is the point. i still am at fault anyway.

gosh. pastor. i need counselling. i really can' t take it much longer. i can't wait to leave them behind and just fly off.

o. how selfish. .................but i just can't help ittttt. and i think i know how they feel.

you know there are just certain times when u reached a certain situation in life when u just really want to forget/erase/demolish/remove certain feelings, people, whatever you have. and then you get so emo and everything and then you just want to spend time with Him/him.

perhaps that canoe vision was for me.. "its not easy, but i will get there somehow."

-----

flying off in less than a month. quite a bit of things not gotten. haven't gotten my camera and my crumpler.

have to settle bank details by this week.

really want to thank God for giving us the cheapest double room accomodation that we need/wanted. 2 out of 7 rooms were given to us. =)

i think i look forward to the plane ride rather than staying there. -.^

ok i'm weird.

--------

ken, i miss you.

well, yea. again, still, continuosusly, whatever. haha long way to go till dec 30 huh. corn suggests i write a letter to you and eat bakwa while i'm at it, so the oil will drip all over the paper and send it over to you.

OR

i can just simply buy and eat the ba kwa and write on the paper which is richly 'submerged' into bahkwa oil and send it to you. se say, the smell is stronger.

your choice, darling. hahahaha

raaaaarh.

rarh.

i'm so irritated i dun have my voice. even more irritated cos it hurts when i try to find my voice.

:(

stupid.

anyways, for any of those who reads this and have yet to watch potter, please call me.

*grumbles: should have watched with yuan and shix. stupid ron...

*wailssssssssssss...: mr fireman, please put the fire out from my throat.

and wth is my parcel??? i'm sure if it took a sampan, it should have gotten here by now! dammit. =(

yay! i got a greeting from nepal. how cool's that! haha liaN!! carve my name at the top of mt everest! thanks. hahahaha

meibai>> ok jio u watch potter, u want? hahahahahahaha

rarhrarhraarh.

laureen is sick. =(

:)

just to receive a phonecall from you again puts a smile on my face.

gosh. love.

haha

jo's baptism

just that 1 line can hurt me so much.

don't know why i'm still thinking abt it.

love's not wholly about contact; its about the space in the heart.

----------

jo had her water baptism today. =) ( congrats, jo! may u be a new person from this day forth!)

just thinking about what uncle jon said today in his sharing, about how some gangster who went through his baptism with the fear that people would see his tattoos all over his body.

he went through with it, and when he came out of the water, his tattoos were all gone.

i serve a God of miracles.

i'm happy. =)

its corn's company day today. she's bringing father and mother to night safari.

=/

that means i can't go. rarh. hahah. oh wells, think will just go shopping..

may i feel better after therapy.

i thought we could do it. its just 8 months.

its barely half of it and there's already a hint of problem.

i dunno maybe i am just pmsing, whatever.

or did it ever occur to u that...

o gee. then again, no internet connection rite? u wouldn't know.

:(

whatever. i don't know, but i really thought you knew; it seems that you don't know much then.

---------

last day at work. feels great.

...but not so now.

emo? yea, u got it right this time.

i had a ffffuuuunnnn day. =)

yay. had a fun fun day. =)

its been long since i actually went out and had fun. Though i waited 4 hours in hall for yuan yuan and shix to get ready. -.-" well. it was still fun after that. =D

carls jr, yuan yuan's treat of my long waited starbucks and a mug of carlsberg with great company. what more can i ask for?

u bet i'm gonna miss it when i'm away for 4 months.

--------

i've been really really happy these past few days; and i can't wait for the weeks to come- hair treatment; meetings with friends- adrian and xj, kc, mj, acers; free shopping- of clothes and crumpling with shix; packing of stuff; and movies!!!

rooooooonnnn...are we pottering??!!!

-------

sometimes i just wonder whats all these God is showing me, sometimes i get so mixed up with my emotions, i just can't think straight- to the extent i don't even know if i'm behaving the way i should.

...sheesh. that sounds wrong. but anyway..

perhaps i'm reading too much into it, perhaps there's nothing to read at all.

oh well, shan't start reading anything. i'll guess i'll just wait by the door with mess for mr postman to deliver my package of love.

yay! i can't wait for everything!!!

was just going through my 21st bday party photos.. and just viewing them put a smile on my face.

i'm refering especially to my fellow acers. especially those who celebrated that special day with me. (including xiao bai aka mei bai) haha

was also thinking about our bbq last night (thanks brain for organinsing): really enjoyed the stupid conversations we had and just to enjoy each other's company. and the thought of not having you guys around for 4 months really sucks. =/ but oh well, i'll be back, and winnie must come back too!!! ( i mean, with her degree la =D)

although it may be just 1 year that most of us knew each other, you can bet our friendship will stay strong. =)

i love you guys. =)

eh minds cafe again, soon leh..