the voice in my head

i thought of what i said, then i shook my head in disbelief, laughed and there's a voice in my head that goes:

"HHAAHAHA.. nonono.. cannot cannot...!!! wth were u thinking!!!"

yea. so. ya. heh.

just a comment

sheesh. being of that mature age, u should have already come to understand why they think like that. its not because it earns big money but perhaps, it is a stable job. a job that they know you wouldn't (very much) have to worry about seasons and all.

in theory "follow your dreams", in practical "do what the world asks of you". passion comes to a nought esp when u are placed in a school of people who can excel in this area.

i have yet to decide my major. my heart says finance. but my head says no. how far can i go? in a school competing with the rest of the elites? which is more preferable: sth you have interest but no ability to score? (and since ur grades actually matter a lot, it affects your success rate in securing a good job.) OR sth which u dun have much interest in- but probably able to secure a good grade?

Life is not just a bed of roses. watch out for the thorns beneath the petals.

you just have to wake up to reality; and you have a lot to learn.

the semi annual attack of the powerful sleepy bug

i think eating makes me sleep.

stupid sleepy bug. shoo. go away.

urghh. the hols are slipping away. cannot staaaaaaaaaaand!! =(

the heart is willing; but the flesh, otherwise.

i reaaaaaaaaly want to get this assignments done and over with.

i reaaaaaaaaaaaly want to finish this stupid proj so that i can start with revising the rest of my mid terms next week.

i reaaaaaaaaaaallly want to start doing.

but the stupid problem is that inertia of starting to do work.

fai would be glad to know that i've popped many chocs in my mouth in a span of an hour to get things going. which, hasn't started.

sigh.

the heart is willing; but the flesh, otherwise.

*twirls ard, plops on the floor, stare into the sky, smile, and thank God i'm alive.

------------------

a dominatrix is not a prostitute.

a symbol of power for women.

confidence, strength, bold

arrogant, sadist, sexual

- scary.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..!!! =@

oh.. btw..

just to clear things up.. haha i'm not pissed abt the whole buaya incident. at least not anymore. hahahaha..

not that i was xiao qi, i just felt superly duperly cheated in feeling guilty abt ron.

like i said, i prob shouldn't have anyway.

but things just come naturally.

not abt character here, but about the feelings of the heart.

thoughts + buaya week

all of a sudden. i feel lost.

its not much of what happened; but rather, i think i have sth for you. to deny, i'll be bluffing myself.

u're someone i nv knew i would actually think i'll develop sth for you.

but it was just yday that you were the first person to come to my mind.

but hey, reality ain't a faiytale.

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i don't like you one bit. that is the end of our friendship.

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went walking ard with serm round hall just now. saw the rest of the other decorations in other blocks.

while observing, i realised that this year's buaya week taught me one thing: love is fickle and true love is hard to find.

and i think i'll give up my search.. for now.

=)

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buaya week!! =)



thaaaaaaaaaaaank you guowei for your efforts in making this week a memorable one.

thank you ronald for being an ass. haha.. and btw, i didn't tell you to drink my milo lor. i told you it was HOT lor thats all!!! eeeediot.

thanks winnie darling for letting me stay in ur room this past week. =D

thanks liannie for the hospitality as well.

thanks shixiu aka 'THE 1' for providing me a chair to sit in the lift.

thanks sean and ronald aka lion heart and lion ballz for the pretty railway track. thanks for the effort and the love.

thanks seniors for your love, care and understanding.

thanks bona for ur understanding and ur concern. ( thanks for helping me get an audition too!! =))

thanks eve for being there.

thanks gazarians for reminding me the joy of staying in hall.

thanks for the love, my acers. =)

thanks heng fai.. for ur love , my photo, the beautiful poem that perhaps.. is really true.

i'll get the pics up when i can, i think. =)

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oh btw, i got in sp!! yay!! hahaha

buaya week

and it has started!!

*jumps ard

haha.. oh wells. just asked myself while i was doing stuff for buayee last night,, why i was looking fwd to such events.

and i thought hard while cutting paper: i love to see everybody happy. =)

i love my astro boy!!!!! hahaha.. oh sheesh.

got to go seokie's bday dinner now..

projects and all can be left to tmr...... i think.

oh dear.

a quick one

ah. week 5. about to be over. and here we all are, staring into week 6 that lies just ahead.

i have 2 quizes- 1 each on mon and tues, 1 presentation and 1 proj to be handed in on wed.

-.-

this means i can't buaya ppl properly laaa!!! =( dammit.

haha..

oh wells.

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serene's leaving tmr.. i start worrying for her then i stopped.

if God is for her, who can be against her?

serene mama, i love you.



wait for me in Osaka! i'm saving!!!!!!!

bin's belated 20th- a few pics

bin and i =)




ling and i =)




me acting cute with animals. hahahaha.. i like the rabbits.




my mouth got food lor. cannot smile properly laa.



ok swallow le. hahahah




bin um-chioing. as usual.

ok. stupid. speed too slow till it wouldn't want to respond. part 2 soon! =)

boring

life is boring.

i need to spice up my life a lil bit.

i think i can't wait for buaya week- altho i'm not stayin there, but i think its fun to see everybody so happy. haha..

oh wells.

life is, currently, boring.

urrrrghhhh.

i still don't understand why i feel this way. i hate it and i just want this feeling to go away.

urgh.

i'm starting to hate you.

Steve Irwin

Steve Irwin was a great man. i love every episode he did.

his love for animals and nature was commendable.

a true legend.

2 movies

i watched 2 movies yday! =D

haha.. watched one with corn in the afternoon on my lappie and another one at night on tv. i figured 2 movies in a day can be quite tiring for the mind actually, when u start digesting what the show really means and how it relates to what u are going thru. afterall, dun waste the producer's efforts who prob had a mindset to produce a movie to inspire ppl and to treasure what they have.

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watched Goal in the afternoon. typical dream coming true story. didn't really think there was much to digest about it except for the religion part- that even if u get famous and the world just kisses your feet, stay true to wat u believe in and dun stray away. Also, gratitude was what hit me in that movie. santiego munez is cute. heh. =p

what i really wanted to comment on was the evening's movie on ch 5: the divine secrets of the ya-ya sisterhood.

it is a superb movie, in my opinion.

i love the way they shot the movie, ilove the storyline, i love how they tried to translate many ideas all at one shot.

1. mother-daughter relationship

this was the main idea that the show revolved about- between an aged mother who has done wrong to her children, due to mental breakdown. and her daughter didn't forgive her because she didn't know what her mother was going thru.

the show also showed the good times and exemplifies a mother's unfailing love for her child. especially when she did all she can to give her daughter another chance to be up the airplane when she rejected to be up there the first time round.

her relationship with her daughter mirrors the exact opposite of the treatment of which she received from her mother.

the show just makes me think abt my relationship with my mother and her relationship with her mummy.

i love my mommmmmyyyyy~ =D

2. psychology

it is because of the terrible treament she received from her mother that caused her to want to give all her love to her daughter.

however, it is because her daughter chooses to remember all the bad times- i.e. during her mother's ill condition- when she was whacked, scolded, beaten, etc. that she threw all the fun times she had with her mother out of her mind. and hence, she has put off her own wedding for 2 years because she didn't want to be oblige to start a family.

ppl choose to remember bad times more than the good times in relationships. why is that so? i think its more about the ache that hurts in the heart that remains longer that those in the stomach (from laughing).

3. friends

it was her childhood friends that got together to try to change the mindset of the daughter's mind. i wonder.. when i reach that age, would i actually have that many and such close friends?

friends are such important people in my life that i dun think i can ever survive very much without them. haha.. i think it'll be so sweet to have such company at that age.

oh btw, i think the old ladies are all so cute. hahahah

4. love

would u actually marry someone who loves you so much but u can't reciprocate the feeling?

they say love can be nurtured. but they didn't say how long it took. haha in the show, it took really long. but anyways, it is a happy ending and i'm happy too. =D

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could have gone on and on but i think i better go sleep.

just to end off with a quote from the mommy to her daughter when she was afraid to go on the plane the second time round:

"nobody got anywhere by being frightened all the time"

true, isn't it? =)

great movie. i like. =D

day + the devil wears prada + birthday wishes =)

had a great and tiring day. =)

had a blast with bin and ling today. spent quite a lot too. haha.. oh dear.

picked up a wallet and returned it back to its rightful owner who is a 14 year old girl. she was super grateful. she should. haha..

we watched 'the devil wears prada'. an interesting show, i must say. both from a fashion point of view as well as the underlying msg it was trying to tell.

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job vs love ones? which would u choose?

"millions of girls who will die for this job"

would i?

the show made me reflect on what i really wanted to achieve in life in terms of my career. This week, after the intern talk, i was quite shaken abt how real this whole job thing is. not that i didn't know i was that close to working, but it was just the thought of the new environment and the new mindset that i must acquire was quite terrifying.

all my life i changed my ambitions from this occupation to another. and the occupation that i wanted to be for the longest time was a house maker aka housewife. which i don't think i'll make a good one anyway (but i'm improving) hahaha.. the thing that made me change my mind was my talk with David in his car that night in sentosa..

he said "housewife?! no way! you strike me as someone who will achieve a lot"

perhaps i will, perhaps i won't.

so it makes me really consider again my life's options- to put on the right shoes for my 2 small feet, which road i want to travel on, which form of transport to take, who i should trust, how much i have to pay, which stop to stop and where to go on from there.

and before i do any of that, its time to choose what to major in.

i'll continue with more reflections once i thoroughly think thru the movie again.

-------

pics of the crazy 3 girls will be up soon~ =) yay. i love ling and bin (and diana and yina)

happy belated belated belated binny binny day!

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happy 20th birthday, darling concy boncy!! =) i love yoU!!

happy 21st birthday, ronaaalDDD!!! u're a niceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooyyyyy... hehe

Jo + hall + timetable + today's events

yay! Jo has a place in the schooL!!!! =) all se has to do now is pass PSLE and she's confirm part of the school! =) oh maaaaaaaan!!!

SH.. i'm really coming back! =D

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to my darling hall mates:

hope u all had a great time yday. wish i was there with u guys too. =) i really want to see harold in that sash. and i bet caleb is reading this. haha.. think i dunno. act blur some more. fed up.

blogs ain't private anymore. haha.. it was never meant to be anyway.

to my ardent fans of my blog: tag me leh. esp the one living in 204 who purposely wanted me to see that he was reading my blog and checks my blog 3 times a day. sheesh.

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recently, i can feel all my energy sapping away again. this sucks. sigh. i would really love to blame the travelling but dun think there's much to blame abt that. haha..

my timetable has finally been finalised! oh yay *jumps ard*

quick! who wants a lunch appt?? hahaha.. u can jio me out on monday even weeks after 3, wednesdays after 1, thursdays after 4 and fridays at any time u want ( tt is if i can wake up) lalalalalalala..~ haha.

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meeting bin and ling ling in like an hour's time. =) yay! i can't wait.

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happy birthday winson~ =)

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opposites attract? think again.