empty nest syndrome

eh i found this when i was doing my research for my assignment, and i thought it was quite interesting..

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Empty-nest syndrome

Written by Christine Webber, psychotherapist and lifecoach and Dr David Delvin, GP and family planning specialist
http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/womenshealth/features/ens.htm

How can you help if you're the young person leaving home?

If you're a teenager who has left home - or is about to go - and you know your mum is really suffering, what can you do?

First of all get her to look at this article. Secondly, if she's very upset, get her to talk things over with a close girlfriend or go to a doctor.

But after that, don't make the mistake of trying to curtail your activities to please her.

Your development depends on you finding your adult feet, and in going off to learn new things, do new jobs and make new friends and relationships. That's the way of the world.

The empty-nest syndrome is actually your mum's problem - not yours.

Of course you'll want to be sympathetic and kind to her. After all, she does love you very much: she wouldn't have empty-nest syndrome if she didn't.

But don't allow yourself to be pressurised into coming home more often than you want, or can afford. And don't fall into the trap of having to call her every day.

Arrange with her when you will phone her and stick to that. Please be fair about this and remember to call when she is expecting you to.

An extra email or text message on top of that will probably help to cheer her up. But don't do so many that she comes to expect them. They should be a pleasant surprise for her - and a pleasure for you to do, not a duty.

Don't forget, this is a time when you're forging your independence. She's got to do the same.
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its the first line that struck me, "if you're a teenager..", its really the difference between Western and Asians,: how independent they are and how dependent we are at that age. perhaps now i get it why people with a "western" mindset at the age of 23 feels embarrass in getting ang pao money.

but it really makes me wonder, so does leaving your home earlier allows you to be more independent and thus allow you to be more career oriented? If you look at it, is that the reason as to why the west has so much more' stronger' business hubs- London, New York, Copenhagen.. compared to Asia, which has perhaps smaller hubs mainly Tokyo, HK, Singapore, Shanghai.. and if you observe it, they are mainly expats from the west. ok, i say observe because i can't find any evidence, hahaha..

alright i think i'll get back to my 10 '300 word' essays.

i finish3 liao. 7 more. urgh.